Latest on the new dp@large

Here are the latest posts…

Johnny Winter

dp@large poll: Do you approve of Obama’s Job Performance?

dp@large opinion poll: Edward Snowden

Madonna lookin’ Caddy

Can Messi rise?

Obama laughs his way through meeting in Texas

Drunk Monkey

Axelle Despiegelaere

Sweetie

Lebron James returns to Cleveland

Largest shopping mall in China makes a comeback

 

 

Plus lots of other interesting articles too…. you should check it out with just a click…  http://dpatlarge.com

Click here to read latest posts on the new dp@large.

dp@large newlook

 dp@large has a new home

http://dpatlarge.com

My email is dpatlarge@yahoo.com

 @dpatlarge and @dpatlarge2

Your comments are always appreciated and welcome!

Click here to read latest posts on the new dp@large.

Paul Walker Porsche Carrera GT crash scene pictures

Paul Walker Porsche Carrera GT crash scene pictures.

Paul Walker, an actor best known for his role as a fast-driving cop opposite bad-guy-gone-good Vin Diesel in the Fast and Furious movie series died on Saturday in a car crash in Santa Clarita, Calif., according to multiple reports. Walker was 40 years old.

News of the fatal crash first spread online after a celebrity news site broke the story. Initially, most other news outlets and Twitter accounts picked it up as a report

My thanks to the photographers who own these images.

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene 2

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene 3

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene4

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene5

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene6

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene 7

Paul Walker   Porsche Carrera GT crash scene 8

dp@large funny gifs #7

 Funny gifs. I really don’t need to say more than that. See if you agree.

Just in time for the weekend!

dp@large funny gifs #7

This is the only way to cure stage fright or fear of speaking in front of a crowd of people. Hope she was wearing a diaper!

cure for fear of speaking in front of people

Okay, sure, the guy makes a catch. But when he puts his head down he tells everyone “I just made the catch of the century.” This is on camera with no celebration or disbelief on his part? Is it ‘shopped? Is it on a string? Penn & Teller could answer that one. 

he planned this

This one I think is not that hard to do. It is just that the rest of the human race is working or dealing with paying their bills to think of this let alone practice it 263,974 times before getting it to actually work. He would have gotten it sooner had his moron cousin on the left actually rolled the tire correctly earlier in the month. 

Luck or skill

This one is all skill. Not to mention he demoralizes his opponent with the behind the back kill shot. End of story. 

tennis table shot for the ages

Here is an idea. Use the door as it was intended.

just pay the fare next time

Well, there you have them, funny gifs #7. Stay tuned, there will be more. Send me your favorite. dpatlarge@yahoo.com  Thanks!

dp@large


Related articles

Driving with a road warrior

Twin Peaks above Poway

Twin Peaks above Poway (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Over the years I have put in some serious road miles. You name it and work has taken me there. The usual procedure is to get an early flight and off to my destination. Once landed, it’s find the rental car bus and a then a short jaunt to the rental car lot. Jump in the car and take off to the client’s office or hotel. Oops, I never fail to ask for map at the rental car check out booth although I usually already have one.

If I am going to a place for the first time, I like to drive around a little and check out the sights. You know, find the super market or something interesting along the way. Hotel food is great but for extended trips, there is nothing like a supermarket dinner. This practice has given me a pretty good understanding of where I am and what’s up there. I recommend you try it next time.

Business travel has changed a lot of the years. The days of the geeky tech guy with the pens in the pocket and calculator has given way and now we have the management guy on his was to Dallas, lap tops are a thing of the past. It is strictly Blackberry, iPhone, water bottle, and khakis with white button down donning  the company logo embroidered above the pocket. You even see guys with running shoes these days on the plane. Will Brooks Brothers ever sell another suit?

I was comparing notes with a road warrior buddy and we had a laugh. I wanted to share with you some of the adventures of driving while on the road. I picked three of my best.  Here goes.

Orlando. Dive Bombing the Disney exit on southbound I-5

You guessed it. The Disney exit. I have learned that the right hand lane is the most dangerous in the state of Florida. Especially the last 2,000 feet before you exit into the Disney complex. Here’s what happens. You are unwittingly cruising along headed south on I-5. If you find yourself in the right hand lanes there is a very good chance that a Disney crazed tourist in a green mini-van full of damn screamin’ kids is in the far left lane and running out time very quickly just ahead of you. Usually the Dad is driving and he is experiencing heavy pressure from the wife in the passenger seat.  She has the map so she knows what SHE is doing. Should he miss the exit he will have to endure up to 2 to 3 hours of grief as the wife repeats “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU MISSED THE EXIT!” He’ll be lucky if that ends by lunch. What is the solution? Dive bomb the Disney exit. That’s right. Signal the right turn the cut across seven lanes of southbound traffic. Wave. Make it to the exit and even run thought the pebbles a bit and you are a hero. Way to go, Dad! You did it. Now, for the rest of us…. Hint. No, make this an arm tattoo. Stay as far left as you can for the 3 miles approaching the Disney exit. Not negotiable. Just do it!

Headed south on 15 splitting North County San Diego

This is a true story. I used to have to go to a client office up in the hills in Poway, California. This is a place home builders and office park developers found and woke up about 15 years ago. Big name companies call Poway home these days.  And how cool is Twin Peaks? I loved going there because I could stay at Rancho Bernardo Inn up the road a few miles. One morning, I was driving to the client office and found myself headed south on I-15 traveling from Rancho Bernardo Inn to my exit which was the Scripps Poway Parkway. It is mostly an easy cruise and downhill until the long exit off ramp. Minding my own business I floated down the hill and happened to catch a glimpse of a high speed Miata gaining quickly on me. Top down. I hadn’t yet arrived that the exit ramp. The driver, a woman, was wearing a big floppy hat, big sunglasses and a tank top. She pulled up to the driver’s door of my car and flipped me the biggest bird you ever saw then sped away. I will always remember seeing the full flex of her bicep supporting a middle finger just for me. I figure I had ruined her morning by going so slowly that she probably had to brake when she didn’t want to. Her way to telling me good morning meant a full on bicep flexing, and special delivery, “BIG F.”  Evidently, karma rules on this road. There must not be a speed limit.  Regardless, I felt welcome and special.

Where 114 and Stemsons Parkway meet in Dallas

Just before you get to the Market Center there is a fork in the road. Well, let’s say speedway… no highway in the road. This is where 114 and Stemmons merges via the  fork. I did this a lot and was always amazed that the traffic joined without a major accident.  No really. Two high speed lanes connect into one. The average speed of the ubiquitous V-8 pick-up truck is about 85 and I am talking about 22 hours a day.  The left lane of the 114 and the right lane of Stemmons blend together. Quickly. I am not real sure how the Texan does this. It is an amazing feeling knowing the you have just run out of your own lane and now share it with another car or truck doing at least 75 mph.

Thrilling. I have the frequent flier miles to prove it. Trust me.

DP@Large answers your questions

Yep! That’s right! It’s time for a little Q & A around here. Got something on your mind? DP@Large wants to help. Ask us anything and we will try to give a little advice.  Not, you know, real advice like medical or legal or anything.

We mean the offbeat, humorous, semi-factual kind. You know, the kind you can’t take to the bank. Or, let’s suffice it to say if you do try to take it to the bank, the branch manager will have you removed kind of advice. 

So what troubles you? Got issues? Don’t be shy! Post your questions in the comments section and we’ll get on it. Should be fun!

Looking forward to hearing from you!

DP@Large

Front End Supervisor rings up Cashier

A gin martini, with olive, in a cocktail glass.

A gin martini, with olive, in a cocktail glass. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Wally plugged away at the store for more than five years. As a Cashier in a busy supermarket, there was always something to keep him busy. Wally was dependable and his supervisor bragged on his ability to balance every time at the end of his shift. “That’s harder to do than it sounds” she said.

Wally, during his off hours would often come in to the store to pick up a few items and chit chat. No big deal, lots of employees did that. It was a family atmosphere with lots of long term employees. Because everyone knew each other pretty well, the whole store knew every one’s business. During work they would trade stories about their spouse or kid’s activities, or what they did the night before.

Unfortunately for Wally, he began to enjoy the night life a little too much. He found some new friends who he described as having less regard for a day of work than I did at the time. Evening parties lasted well into the early morning. All the parties and extra-curricular activity got Wally out of his groove. He was spending more on drinks and clubs than ever before. His co workers noticed him not being himself and coming into working looking like he was dragging a sack. Over a period of time, Wally’s job performance began to decline.

The supervisor noticed she had to recount his till more than usual. Wally, the usually dependable cashier began calling off more and more and sometimes just a few minutes before his shift. His supervisor kept track of his excuses and knew sometimes he just made something up when he called in sick. “At first, I believed him. His excuses became a regular feature. After a while, I knew something was up.” Wally missed more and more work and as he tells it, “The real reason was all the partying, I was out regularly and with all my new good time friends, I really got off track.” Wally was eventually terminated due to excessive absences and tardiness. He said, “I am more focused now so I think I learned my lesson. What did me in? Probably the last straw was when I told her my Grandfather passed away and I had to tend to the family. Everyone at work knew my Dad was 86 years old,” he smiled and shook his head and said… “Do the math.”

Golden Retrievers

Ranger

I have been a Golden Retriever parent for 13 years. My first Golden came home with us when she was a puppy. We got her when she was about 12 weeks old. The kids were small and they grew up together.

When we were looking for a dog, we were thinking about Labs, German Shepards, and Goldens. We looked forever and interviewed so many dogs. One day we were at a puppy store and I bumped into my first, we named her RAINBOW. She was in pen and she gave me this….Hello, if you have a credit card and can get me out of here today, I will love you forever and be the best GR ever” look.

It worked, a couple of hours later Rainbow was home with us. We had a huge fenced in yard at all Rainbow had to worry about was how and when to play. She loved going into the pool and was an amazing swimmer. She was patient with the kids so she never seemed to mind when Julia, then 4, would stick her hand in Rainbow’s mouth or something.

Finding the name Rainbow only took about three weeks. We left it to the kids to come up with the name. The only problem was that made a legal pad list of names and kept trying names out. Poor dog. One moment we had the final name, by the afternoon the kids couldn’t remember what they named her. My wife put an end to it. The only way to was rule by decree. The name was RAINBOW! End of discussion.

Rainbow was smart. We somehow managed to teach her to retrieve the newspaper every morning. Rainy would go out without a leash, hunt down the paper and bring it back in the house every morning without fail. If you know Golden behavior, when they think they are doing something that pleases you, they are so proud! Rainy was proud.

We also taught her to deliver cold water bottles. I forgot to say we were living in Florida. When were out tending to the roses or cutting the lawn, there was nothing better than an ice cold water bottle. Better yet, a cold one delivered by Rainbow right to you where ever you were in the yard. This was a pretty easy task, Rainy would take the water bottle in her mouth and run over to where you were and plop it down in front of you. She was so proud and loved the praise. Beer, why didn’t I think of Rainy delivering a cold beer? Drat!

Rainbow also loved tennis balls. She could carry two in her mouth and tried endlessly to get a third. She was successful only a couple of times. Three was too hard. Two was an all day, every day thing. She especially loved a brand new out of the can tennis ball. It was like gold to her.

We lost Rainy 12 years later to a battle with cancer. Life without Rainy was hard, we lost a family member, a clown, a listener and the best companion ever.

Enter RANGER

We are sitting there in the TV room about 6 months later and on the local news was a story about how the animal shelter was out of blankets and supplies. The news story was basically a cry for community support. The spot had video of dogs locked up. The pan shot showed a huge Golden. My wife said to me, “Did you see that? Someone let go of their Golden! We need to check this out!’ The next morning we crossed town and demanded to take that Golden home with us. Honestly, we got the run around. We got nowhere. The shelter gave us a bunch of excuses.

I happened to be friends with the President of the GR rescue in our area. I called her and said we want dibs on the dog. Lucky for us, we got him. We named him RANGER. Ranger has been our boy for a year now. He is a big boy, 108 pounds with a gorgeous dark red coat. The shelter told us that someone found him wandering the streets. They thought he was homeless for a couple of weeks at least. They also said he was probably abused.

How could someone let go of a dog like this? Goldens are very smart, they have a family intuition, and are loyal beyond imagination.  They learn from you and never forget. We are so fortunate to have Ranger with us. What a friend he has been to all of us. He doesn’t bark, can’t play tennis ball, nor can he sit still when it is time to eat. You never saw a dog eat. He can put it away. He is also a couch potato! He loves the outdoors and will stay out in the yard for hours at a time. He loves to lay in the sun and roll around in the grass. It is fun to watch him keep himself entertained.

By the way, if you are considering a dog, you should look up your local Golden Retriever rescue and inquire. There are so many friendships waiting to happen. Go through the process, it is worth it. We are blessed to have such a wonderful and wacky friend and dog.  Viva la RANGER!